things I thought about on our date night

For the second year in a row, on Friday night, our church held a date night for Valentine's day.  For a set price, you get a catered meal, a drink and a dessert.  Last year it was a comedian that we watched a simulcast of, and this year it was trivia night.

I have to stop here and tell you something about myself.  I DETEST competition.  I have absolutely zero competitiveness about me.  The thought of a game night with church friends was enough to make me nervous the whole day before going to this.  I do not know why I am like this, I have tried so many times to pray and ask God to take this from me, and though I know He hears me, this never goes away fully.  I am okay with it because it makes me pray a LOT, and I know that it's something He will use in my life to show me, or use as an example for someone else's benefit.  I really am okay with it, though I don't necessarily love this trait about myself.

Anyway, I said all of that to say that it was fun.  We competed as tables and not against with those we sat by.  We sat at a table with three other couples, and we actually ended up winning second place and each couple went home with a $15 movie gift card.

Something I thought of on this night was that whether winning or whether losing, attitude is so important.  It's never worth winning if  someone's feelings are hurt in the process.  It's not worth winning, to me, if it can't be all in good, clean fun.  Now this did not happen on this night, it's just a thought I had while we were sitting there and while everyone else at the table was coming up with all the answers.  The only answers I could come up with were the ones in the Bible category, and the name of the movie Mr. Mom from 1983.

I guess I always think about impressions, and how I come across to others.  I know that I want and need to come across as loving, kind, and generous.  I'm not saying I always accomplish this, because TRUST ME, some days I am just in a bad mood, but I really try to focus on how others might perceive me.  (This can have a bad side to it~it can also mean that I have people pleasing tendencies, and that is not good.  I need to only have God pleasing tendencies.)

I know that I want and need my words to be life giving and gentle.  I used to be a terrible gossip, y'all.  Seriously.  I love to know things.  I love to read, I love to be in the know, I love information.  Well, I found myself getting too careless with some friends, and I had to pull away from those relationships.  It was not them, it was ME.  I talked to one friend about this after some time apart, and I apologized for the way I handled it with her; I should have said all this up front, but I pulled away, then said it all later.  I'm thankful that God showed me that, and that she was sweet enough to extend grace to me.

I also want to make sure that when I speak of others, that I speak of them as if they were standing right beside me.  I try to always give others the benefit of the doubt, just because I am someone who tries to focus on the positive instead of the negative.  Sometimes I am teased for this, and sometimes someone will disagree with me, but I have to do that anyway.  I LOVE this verse from Psalm 19:14:

May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable to You, LORD, my rock and my Redeemer.

I pray this verse aloud all the time.  I really mean that...all. the. time.  I cannot ask this of God enough.  I want all my words and thoughts be honoring to Him.  I always ask that He would give me His heart, His eyes for someone or some situation.  I cannot ask Him that enough either.  His ways are so much better than my ways, especially when my ways tend to be mean or judging of others.  (I pray everyday that He would not let me be those things to anyone.)  Again~I do not always succeed at this.  But I pray and ask God's forgiveness when I fail.

I am writing this today as a reminder to myself.  To my boys, if they so happen to read this. I need to read the word of God over and over and over again on the topic of loving others and letting my actions speak of that love.  Not because it's the thing to do right now, or because tomorrow is Valentine's day, but because this is how Christ Jesus loved us: that while we were still sinners, He died for us.  He didn't die for the godly, but for the ungodly, I read in Romans 5 this morning.  I need to love because He first loved me.

Well, that's all thanks to our date night Friday night at church.  It's funny that God uses such ordinary, mundane things in my life that speak volumes to me.  This is actually the second thing in as many weeks that God has shown me all of this.  Friday night was one example, but another example recently was a youth dodge-ball tournament that got a little mean-spirited.  I didn't go that night, but through them telling me what all went on, we were provided with lots and lots of examples of how to better handle certain situations.

I love that He does this for me, though, because I am no biblical scholar by any stretch of the imagination, but I get down to earth and simple examples.  This is just one of the many, many ways that He is so kind to us.

I love Him so much.

Thanks for reading my rambling thoughts, friends.  I hope your Monday is fantabulous.  Love to all.

(Also, I really wish we had gotten a picture with our friends that we sat with Friday night.  They are a fun group of people, and I am thankful that our church provides opportunities like this to give us good, clean fun.)