Growing Up

I don't understand where all the time goes.  It seems like just yesterday I was having my first child, and here it is nine point five years later.  I remember the first time they placed Graham in my arms, I thought my heart would just burst out of my chest.  I had heard that it was normal if you didn't love your baby right away...many mothers don't supposedly, and I was prepared for that detachment at first.  But that never came.  I have never known love like that until I had a child.  Unless you're a mom, it's hard to understand, but the love just grows and grows and grows.  

It was like that each time I had a child...when Drew came along, I didn't think I'd love him as much.  I mean, how could I?  I already had my heart all filled up with Graham.  But I did, I loved him every bit as much as I did Graham, and I didn't think anymore love was in me.  Then came Jonah and Noah.  I could not do anything for one I didn't for the other, but love them both the same, I did.  

Why am I writing this, you wonder?  Well, I was at the boys' school working today (imagine that), and I saw the fourth graders walk by.  Okay, first off, he's in FOURTH GRADE.  Secondly, all those kids are huge compared to my little Graham.  I said something to his teacher about how huge they all were and she said, "I know, I love him that small.  He's my little Graham."  And she smiled and walked away.   I finished my stuff, and went to leave, and saw his class again, leaving art.  He ran up to me and hugged me and said, "Mom, I need to buy some posterboard for school for tomorrow!!"  I said, "Okay, we'll talk about this afternoon."  I tried to leave but he stopped me again and said, "Mom, I need the poster because I'm running for student government."  You could have knocked me over.  I cannot believe my child is old enough for this...so here we sit, him making his poster by himself and me biting my tongue to make it nicer.  =)  The neatness in me is coming out.  But all I said was to write nice and big so people could read it from far off.  I just can't believe he's so grown.  I was talking to a friend tonight, and she said in a few years I'll be the mayor of Testosterone City.  Ugh, I am definitely not ready for that.  I guess I'd better get used to them being independent, though.  This is the beginning of the rest of my life....